Having re-styled herself over the years into Malibu Barbie, Ivanka Trump believes anything is possible if you’re wearing the right pair of designer pumps. 

So it was that, older but no wiser than she was when she toddled into the White House on her adoring Daddy’s arm, Ivanka tagged along to Japan for the G-20 Summit Cotillion and North Korean 4th of July Barbecue. 

Little did she suspect that people could be so unkind to such a darling girl as she!  After all, she had her very own tall tube of tooth paste by her side to make her look almost real. 

So life-like!

But even she has to admit that maybe she went a bit too far trying to fill her souvenir photo album with cute candids and quotable quotes.

Now her dream of being the first Princess President seems to be fading into the peach-scented mist that wafts through her blonde vinyl head.  

How COULD those mean old dignitaries give her the frosted shoulder, when she pouted her prettiest and flung her incredibly graceful fingers into all kinds of artful angles of flirtatious expression.

She was sure she used the perfect code words for getting down with a couple of strong lady types: “Grrr …male- dominated… blah-blah-blah…,”  but they just left her standing there looking like a gooseberry.

Ivanka: “It’s so unfair!  I didn’t even get to talk disarmament with Kim…or give hair and makeup tips to  Mrs. May.”

DJT: “Nevermind, Honey; Daddy doesn’t like them very much anyway.  I’ll let you fly the plane a little on the trip home.  Would you like that…huh, Sweetie? 

“…And tell that husband of yours, there’ll be no hanging upside down in the john. It just scares the heck out of me every time!”

“Let’s go home, kids!”