For anyone watching it’s been a long, long week of zigzagging statements and generally crazy news from source Donald. But right now it’s Friday at last and the reports have slowed to a crawl. And it’s quiet, almost too quiet. A no doubt exhausted President Trump fled Washington D.C. for one of his golf courses — but it’s likely only a matter of time before he feels the urge and lets go on his twitter account again.

But until he does here’s something from The Onion.com:

WASHINGTON — Revealing that the physical world could no longer bear the weight of numerous contradictory realities, sources confirmed Friday that dozens of Whites Houses have begun to leak from a temporal vortex as President Trump’s rapidly changing story of meeting Putin tears apart space-time. “A White House is blinking in and out of reality atop the Washington Monument, and another has materialized inside the wall of a Georgetown apartment building—it appears the fourth dimensional plane is collapsing in on itself as Trump’s untenable, competing statements rupture the very foundation of time and relativity,” said astrophysicist Maria Steagall .[…]

One witness reported seeing 6,000 Mike Pences pouring out of a small wormhole in the Cabinet room before suddenly vanishing. Countless universes are colliding and folding over each other every time Trump disputes his earlier statements; this is one of the greatest traumas the fabric of the universe has suffered since the Big Bang.

And that either would or wouldn’t be funny.