Here, if you have a milkshake, and I have a milkshake, and I have a straw. There it is, that’s a straw, you see? You watching? And my straw reaches acrooooooss the room, and starts to drink your milkshake.
I… drink… your… milkshake!
(sucking sound) I drink it up!
(from Newt Gingrich’s victory speech, Columbia, South Carolina, January 21, 2012)
Man, I have never been so happy to be dead wrong in my entire life.
Eleven days ago, I wrote a little post on GMD called “Yeah, so it’s Mitt,” proclaiming that Mitt Romney had the Republican nomination sewn up.
And by all rights, he should have. He had a big lead, he had momentum, he had big money, and he had the GOP establishment closing ranks behind him. He was widely seen as the most electable of the Republican candidates — or, to be more precise, the least unelectable, given the obvious shortcomings of the other contenders.
But then, he spent the last seven days projectile-vomiting all over his Guccis. Inept debate performances, hamfisted handling of the tax-return question, blithe ignorance of the Grand Canyon-sized gap between his finances and those of everyday Americans, and an air of boarding-school arrogance that even most Republicans find distasteful. Let’s just call him Nigel Incubator-Jones (“his best friend is a tree, and in his spare time he’s a stockbroker”) blindly firing his shotgun.
So I was wrong. Still, I think he has an edge in the race, because Newt doesn’t really have a campaign — he just has his own, 100-proof, bottled-at-the-source egotism. But Romney’s gonna have to stop making stupid mistakes immediately or he’ll go down in history as the most incompetent person to seriously contend for the Presidency since his forerunner as overly entitled Republican patrician “can’t miss candidate,” Thomas E. Dewey.
And even if Mitt does manage to pull out of his self-induced death spiral, he’s been exposed as a much weaker challenger to President Obama than he was thought to be this time last week.
So whoopee, the Republicans are set up for a long, painful, beautiful bloodletting. And if Mitt keeps going like this, we’ll actually see Newt Gingrich capturing the Republican nomination for President.
I was wrong, and I couldn’t be happier. Bring it on!
equal parts PT Barnum and Adolph Hitler.
He has take to heart both the theatrics of PT and Adolph’s favorite political motto: the best way to unite people is against something (or someone) else…in this case, Mitt.
He has no “gentleman’s agreement” with the ostensibly moderate wing of the Republican party. He is all-for-Newt.
Add a significant windfall of cash at the right moment for last minute ad buys to rally the base, and this guy has proven he will take no prisoners.
If he goes down in flames he will gladly take the entire Republican party with him.
They are a funny fair, Mitt and Newt. The one guy is as bland and undefined as a chameleon, while the other is banging the wall at the extreme right of the party and savagely yelling for a bump-out into crazy land.
Remember in 2000 when we didn’t take Bush too seriously? Also, I fear that Romney will now try to move into Newt’s right pocket. I think we ain’t seen nothin’ yet, as far as these guys and Santorum go, or, for that matter, the whole Republican Party. Democrats really need to move more to the Left. Livable wages, Social Security, workers’ rights are under attack.
Ya know, if you’re Rich, or, like Newt, being funded by the Rich, you can afford a shitload of wives and second homes.
Dems should point out that the Moral and Economic decay in America is being caused by those who love money more than their country and their neighbors.