(Cross posted at Broadsides.org)
Just when I thought I could take a breather from the shallow end of mainstream politics, up steps Grandpa McCain with his best imitation of the dirty old man with his selection of Sarah Palin as his vice presidential nominee. Come on, did you see how creepy McCain looked while lurking about the podium while Palin tried to speak? Watch it, Johnny-boy, because Sarah’s hubby races snowmobiles. But, then again, with an ice-cold wife like Cindy, Johnny’s certainly used to getting his ass kicked around.
McCain’s selection of Palin, however, could certainly be the pinprick to the Obama hope balloon that the Republicans – and the Clinton’s – have been looking for. And he’s delivered it before all those adoring Obama fans even had time to wipe the running eyeliner off their cheeks from last night’s tears of elation. Oh, the beauty of…of… of… oh yeah, hope. Whatever.
I ran into a staunch Democrat this morning while picking up my morning newspapers and, after uttering the obligatory “it was great” mantra with that far away look in his eyes that seemed to be searching for some proof – any proof! – for his feelings, he came forward with this whispered caveat: “But why did Obama soft-pedal his critique of Bush/Cheney?”
The answer was simple. Because Obama’s Democratic Party and, in many cases Obama himself (FISA, Patriot Act reauthorization, Iraq War funding, etc.) did NOTHING to stop Bush/Cheney. And they know it. It’s the modern Democratic Party dilemma of being terminally disqualified at election season based on its own legislative season inanities. Remember the mid-term election of 2006, for example, when the Democrats told us that with control of both houses of Congress they’d be able to stymie that twin tower of bastardism, Bush/Cheney? And how, exactly, did that work out for us? Cue Emily Latela and one more, big “never mind” to the nation.
Sadly, the Democrats seem to be all about the next, great rainbow chase over the horizon. They all but sit on their hands during the Republican rainy seasons (and, let’s face it, it’s been pouring for eight years), roll out their next, great rainbow candidates (Gore! Kerry! Obama!) in the election seasons, and then send their faithful and ever-forgiving followers out searching for that elusive pot of gold. For Democrats, the bullshit of election season continues to hijack their ever-so-meager attempts at accomplishment during legislative season. And around and around they go.
Repugnant as it is, when the smarmy Republicans want a world war, by golly, they start one. Worse, they let it linger and fester and drain us all until…well…they find a new one! Hey, it’s not as if the Democrats – at least the ELECTED Democrats – are going to stop them.
But wait. This was supposed to be about Sarah Palin (cue sound of screeching halt).
Let’s face it, Grandpa McCain hit the trusty “refresh” key with his choice of Palin. Oh sure, it all amounts to one more warm piss in the kiddie pool of a campaign season stuck in the shallow end (nothing new there), but, if shallowness shall rule (hope, anyone?), McCain just upped the ante by playing his Palin card.
Let’s recap the game as it’s now being played out seemingly without parental approval: Obama has hope. McCain has experience. Biden has experience. Palin has hope.
Oh fuck, checkmate.
But, in this case, we’re the losers. Yeah, “we”, as in: we, the people. Because the more the two corporate parties are hell-bent on dragging us down this moronic road of nothing but clichés, the more the great spectacle of nothing in particular distracts us all from a whole lot of important matters. You know, those “silly” and “distracting” things like war, peace, health care, global warming and the like.
By now, we all know why McCain picked Palin: She’s young, she’s a woman, she’s an outsider and she’s conservative. In other words, she’s “better” than Hillary Clinton when it comes to rule number one in the not-so-great game of presidential politics: Superficial appeal is all that matters.
McCain and the Republicans are all but wetting themselves with their hopes that the Democrats will begin attacking Palin for (what?) being young, energetic, an outsider and – oh no, here comes that word again – hopeful. Hmm, all that seems to sound familiar. Oh yeah, that’s all sooooo Obama.
Better yet, McCain and the Republicans are hoping beyond hope that the Obama faithful childish trashing of Palin will only further irk the Hillary crowd, which as you’ll recall, doesn’t just include women but also the working class that Palin and her husband just happen to come from.
Oh my, we are, indeed, a nation stuck in the shallow end of what should be a very large political pool. Sooner or later the lifeguards have got to declare that it’s “adult swim time,” no?